We all need to listen more than we talk, and more importantly, we need to respond to what we hear.
That means we can’t ignore what someone is telling us.
Listen without interrupting, as if there is nothing in the world more important that the person you are speaking.
What happens in someone’s brain when you are paying full attention?
Their brain will release endorphins which are happy chemical. Their self-esteem will go up, and they will like you more.
The payoff of listening is extraordinary.
2-Pause before replaying
A lot of people jump into talk as soon as the other finish the sentence.
Do the opposite, pause for 3-4 seconds and then start expressing your opinion. Next thing to do is to tell the other person that what he said was important.
It will reinforce his value, and he will see you as an attractive and intelligent person.
3- Make questions for clarification
Don’t pretend that you know all. Help him to expand his opinion by asking: How do you mean? Or What do you say exactly?.
One of the most important rules of communication is- The one asking has control over the conversation.
The one answering is fully concentrated on what he is saying. The trick to charming someone is to make questions thoughtfully. All effective communicators use this.
4-Feed it back, paraphrase it in your own words
When a person finishes speaking you pause and say something like, “So, you just did this, then this happened, and then you decided to do that?”
You continue by asking another question or comment what he said.
Turn your whole body toward the person you are talking.
If you are sitting lean your body. Try leaning slightly forward than sitting upright or bending backward.
Unfold your arms and animatedly use them when you speak.
If they are talking something important, lean a little farther in.
If they say something amusing, relax by sitting or leaning back a little.
All these signals suggest that you are fascinated by what they are saying.